Fresh Yellow Baby Potatoes, 1.5 lb Bag

I love these little golden potatoes. My only complaint is that they sometimes include potatoes that are turning GREEN. It is recommended that you NOT EAT GREEN POTATOES, as they contain a poisonous substance. Please educate the folks choosing produce for pickup orders, NOT to choose potatoes that have any GREEN on them at all. Thanks

These are potatoes. They are meant to be eaten. They are not approved by any building authority, municipality, HOA, or sane contractor. However. The moment I opened the bag, I noticed something unsettling: these potatoes have structural confidence. Uniform size. Dense mass. A quiet resilience that says, “I could support a modest pergola if society collapsed.” 🥔 Physical Characteristics Smooth golden skins. Compact bodies. No hollow theatrics. Each potato feels like it was stress-tested in a lab that also designs bridge pylons. They stack surprisingly well, which again: not recommended. 🧱 Hypothetical, Non-Compliant Uses (Do Not Attempt) Temporary shims: One potato under a wobbly table leg provides stability until nature reclaims it. Emergency thermal mass: Retains heat far longer than expected. Warm. Comforting. Slightly alarming. Conceptual mortar: Mashed potatoes exhibit adhesion properties that would confuse an inspector and delight a philosopher. To be clear: Do not build with these. Permits will not be granted. 🍽️ Actual Food Performance Roasted: crispy outside, buttery inside, elite behavior. Boiled: cooperative, drama-free. Mashed: forms a cohesive unit with excellent morale. They excel at the job they were hired for. 🧠 Overall Impression These potatoes feel like they: could survive a mild apocalypse would judge inferior starches have opinions about load distribution belong in both a kitchen and a thought experiment