Poof, (Paperback)

With a translucent orb given him by Osirs the Alien containing a vial of the Buddha's tears, Geronimo's bible, Cleopatra's hand-mirror, Socrates' yo-yo, a Nicolaus Copernicus telescope lens, the Teddy Roosevelt toothpick he chewed charging up San Juan Hill, Leonardo da Vinci's scissors, Van Gogh's painting trowel, Crazy Horse's moccasins, and a lock of the Minotaur's hair, eighteen year-old Eric Foster hauls his relics to Happytime Hot Springs and Unusual Event Center in Boulder, Colorado. Psyched for his best summer ever, he befriends Andy the Inter-Dimensional Hot Springs Dog and competes for Atlantean granola-girl Valentina Meraki's affections with nemesis Hardbreath. Osris pops in looking like Jesus and The Big Lebowski, Colonel Chemtrail and his Space Force Hot Spots arrive with Socrates, the Buddha, Copernicus, da Vinci, Van Gogh, and Teddy Roosevelt and Happytime happy times rocket over the moon. Laughing Disease pandemics the planet, Glenda the Glacier goes rogue, and Marty the Meteor is slated to mash Earth's potatoes. Famed Hollywood director Quentin Quarantino and assistant Clora Quinn are filming a Happytime documentary. "This will win an Academy Award." Alien FBI agents hound the Happpytime gang all the way to the last open cosmic portal, in Chaco Canyon New Mexico, Happytimers diving through seconds before Marty's impact, rodeo-riding the Milky Way to Sirius the Dog Star, safe among galactic creatures knowing how to dodge a large space-rock. - A perception-provoking defiance of reality with a hundred humorous spins, Poof is Magical Realism, Eastern Mysticism, and dad-gummed American Gumption. A modern Alice in Wonderland, a satirical re-examination of Humanity, a butt-load of fun. - tenderbastard.com